JUst cross out the agency moniker “FBI” and replace it with “nefarious and multi headed hydra”. Then, keep on reading.

PTDC0010

Those damned civilians! I wish I coulda done to them the kind of things I did to foreigners on my last posting to Afghanistan! WHy, these sex freaks and weirdos wouldn’t stand a chance against waterboarding, or watching me put my hands on/all over their children–me, a genuine, certified American Law enfarcer from America! I am a patriot! And nothing says PATRIOT like bringing the war home to American children, and the mothers who might/could make them!

 

PTDC0011

Can you spot me at this shindig? I am the one with “All American Hero” magazine in my hand–in the bathroom at the time.

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